Price: $13.95
Vintage: 2010
Date drunk: March 3rd, 2012
g.: I tried to smell this and got wine on my face. How does that even happen?
*Second smell* I made a sound I can't even spell. I think it was "hrrrnnnnn." Despite this, the ocean theme makes me really hope I like it. Everyone loves sea glass, right? What ocean-adjacent kid didn't spend time collecting the broken remnants of beach parties? So, full disclosure, we bought this because of the name, and because of the 20 other wines we turned down due to their condescending marketing targeted at women ("ge-wurtz-whaaaat? I like to shop!"), or their lame slogans. Tough crowd.
*SIP* Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh it tastes like if you put the Gulf of St. Lawrence inside a swimming pool full of dogs.
Also it went up my nose. This is not going well.
d.: *sips* Oh, that's difficult.
g.: Well put.
d.: It's sweet like the candy you find in the backseat of your parents' Lada the day after the Pictou Lobster Carnival.
g.: It's like a candy corn on your closet floor 5 months after Halloween. In a pool full of dogs. And a dumptruck full of sugar. I think I'm seriously damaging my pancreas.
d.: Who would put their sugar in a dumptruck?
g.: Just about everyone.
[I could barely read my own handwriting on that one. To recap:
- TOO SWEET
- OWWWW]
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